Dear Friends,
I am withholding names of concerned people in the event I am going to narrate today.
Sister of a man aged about 38 came for help last year around this time. she wanted her brother to forget the girl he loved who refused to come out of her house to marry him against her parents' wishes, perhaps.
It was two years since there was heavy silence from both sides.
Boy seemed to lose interest in his life and was quite frustrated.
After work he would come home and even if he were to request for some tea, his sisters at home would tell him to go find a wife who would make it for him as they wont be around for long making him tea all their lives!
Which was true yet he wont budge nor look at any proposals his family would get for him.
Then one day his sister invited me over to her son's birthday party and the boy got talking to me. We were talking for the first time though I knew his background and about his refusal to get married to anyone else.
As we got talking he felt he should come to me for some counseling and advice.
I fixed a convenient time and asked him to air out whatever he felt. As usual he dint want to let down the girl he loved and dint understand why the girl dint have the courage to take a bold step when he was prepared to take her in as his wife.
Caste plays an important role in India and that was the primary reason for the girl's parents refusing to listen to any reasoning by the girl to get married to him.
I talked to him less and listened more to what he had to say.
When it was my turn to talk i reasoned out to him.
I pointed out that he was perhaps wasting his time waiting for this girl to come when she dint have the guts to take a few steps towards his house. Incidentally they both are neighbors and loved each other for more than 3 years!
I told him he was not getting any younger and that he needed a companion in life and it was time to get settled with the few proposals that still came his way.
His ideal time according to his chart cast by me was before July, 2009 and I told him so. I also pointed out that her parents were against her marrying him when they talked to me last about the matter, though I could never meet the girl who was always at home and there was always someone around. So no question of ever talking to her. I knew that this boy was wasting his time waiting for her.
I convinced him that he has to get married and the time was quite short and if not it could very well take even longer to find a suitable bride for him.
This was April, 2009.
In June 1st week the sister came smiling to invite me for her brother's marriage and gave me a generous compliment of turning around her brother to listen to reason when the same turned on deaf ears for so long however much his family tried to talk to him about it.
The wedding was fixed for July 6th, 2009 and the girl was his colleague from the same office he worked in.
This girl was also from a different caste from his.
Anyways the marriage took place and the girl was also in her mid thirties.
God is great. I see the couple happily going about leading a happy life from time to time. I am happy for them.
Yet I feel sad whenever I see or meet this girl who is still not married.
Her parents are now quite free of the tension from this boy who is now married. Whether they are going to take any concrete steps to get her married is to be seen and not discussed or talked about.
I watch silently with prayers in my heart for this girl whose parents wont budge to give her that happiness of selecting her own mate!
Only God can save such girls.
Take care.
Mahalakshmi
Friday, April 23, 2010
Wednesday, April 21, 2010
Getting Better
cho Dear Friends,
A battery of tests revealed that I have sugar, cholesterol and some stones in the gall bladder. The doctor ordered me to take pills to keep it under check as it is just in the beginning stages. Walking for an hour everyday which is what I worry about as I am the home bird type of person. Dieting is also recommended.
Today being day one, I walked inside the house itself for an hour. Already low on rice intake so no issues there. Had coffee without sugar and it tasted bitter but I am used to this taste so no issues there too.
Only worried about intake of so many medicines for life for sugar and cholesterol complaints.
My husband after his accident on the 6th March, has been trying to exercise and walk and bend his knee and the effort shows. Though he has been out in the car on visits to the doc yet he wanted to test walk to a footwear shop some distance away. He asked me out so both went together walking slowly along the non-existing footpath with vehicles plying so close by. I was worried.
I could see the joy in his face as we climbed up to the first floor to the shop for his new pair of sandals. He tried a few before he settled for something good and comfortable for the new condition of his left leg.
Today was a great day as my husband is trying to be back to normal and this was the first day out in a proper sense. I have faith and hope that all will well soon. We both are trying to put behind us all the unpleasant surprises we have had in many areas of our lives.
Moving on in life is the only thing we are now concentrating.
God bless us all in our endeavors.
Mahalakshmi
A battery of tests revealed that I have sugar, cholesterol and some stones in the gall bladder. The doctor ordered me to take pills to keep it under check as it is just in the beginning stages. Walking for an hour everyday which is what I worry about as I am the home bird type of person. Dieting is also recommended.
Today being day one, I walked inside the house itself for an hour. Already low on rice intake so no issues there. Had coffee without sugar and it tasted bitter but I am used to this taste so no issues there too.
Only worried about intake of so many medicines for life for sugar and cholesterol complaints.
My husband after his accident on the 6th March, has been trying to exercise and walk and bend his knee and the effort shows. Though he has been out in the car on visits to the doc yet he wanted to test walk to a footwear shop some distance away. He asked me out so both went together walking slowly along the non-existing footpath with vehicles plying so close by. I was worried.
I could see the joy in his face as we climbed up to the first floor to the shop for his new pair of sandals. He tried a few before he settled for something good and comfortable for the new condition of his left leg.
Today was a great day as my husband is trying to be back to normal and this was the first day out in a proper sense. I have faith and hope that all will well soon. We both are trying to put behind us all the unpleasant surprises we have had in many areas of our lives.
Moving on in life is the only thing we are now concentrating.
God bless us all in our endeavors.
Mahalakshmi
Sunday, April 18, 2010
Dream Home - 2
Dear Friends
How does one select the ideal location for a home or is there a method to this madness at all :)
Four of a family go out in different directions for work or study. Usually the location is decided with the kids in mind. So it invariably is within a comfortable radius to the school with the elder commuting further for work, if need be.
Or is it the proximity to a bus stop, shops, hospitals, workplace and/or schools, if there are school going kids in the family.
The parents are wise if they chose a good neighborhood where the crime rate is less or not at all, where good schools, hospitals are near by. Our investments are based mostly on such parameters when we want to buy a house.
Infrastructure like good roads, proximity to airport and railway stations are welcome too. It pays to be well-connected and have maximum facilities before deciding on a major issue such as selecting a home.
Once these are in place, the plan for the home sweet home starts with how many rooms and how much can we really afford to invest.
Should we be going in for a loan from the bank? In most cases we have to. Then what is the repaying capacity or are we going to overstretch ourselves and grab any money that is dangled before us in the form of loans? We never sit down to calculate the real price of our home if we were to borrow money at interest. It could well be double the cost of the property in say 10 years from hence. When we sell, we look at what we paid at the time of purchase and forget to add the interest we have paid all these years to this base price. So when we are able to find a buyer for a price which is 2 times our purchase price, we seem so happy to have made a handsome profit but have we really :(
All said and done its so nice to live in our own place, get used to our neighborhood, make good friends and sort of settle down, bank loan, repayments notwithstanding!
Enjoy life and living.
Cheers.
Mahalakshmi
How does one select the ideal location for a home or is there a method to this madness at all :)
Four of a family go out in different directions for work or study. Usually the location is decided with the kids in mind. So it invariably is within a comfortable radius to the school with the elder commuting further for work, if need be.
Or is it the proximity to a bus stop, shops, hospitals, workplace and/or schools, if there are school going kids in the family.
The parents are wise if they chose a good neighborhood where the crime rate is less or not at all, where good schools, hospitals are near by. Our investments are based mostly on such parameters when we want to buy a house.
Infrastructure like good roads, proximity to airport and railway stations are welcome too. It pays to be well-connected and have maximum facilities before deciding on a major issue such as selecting a home.
Once these are in place, the plan for the home sweet home starts with how many rooms and how much can we really afford to invest.
Should we be going in for a loan from the bank? In most cases we have to. Then what is the repaying capacity or are we going to overstretch ourselves and grab any money that is dangled before us in the form of loans? We never sit down to calculate the real price of our home if we were to borrow money at interest. It could well be double the cost of the property in say 10 years from hence. When we sell, we look at what we paid at the time of purchase and forget to add the interest we have paid all these years to this base price. So when we are able to find a buyer for a price which is 2 times our purchase price, we seem so happy to have made a handsome profit but have we really :(
All said and done its so nice to live in our own place, get used to our neighborhood, make good friends and sort of settle down, bank loan, repayments notwithstanding!
Enjoy life and living.
Cheers.
Mahalakshmi
Friday, April 16, 2010
The dream house!
Dear Friends!
The wish to plan a home of our dreams. It goes through our minds all the time. when we have enough time we plan it on paper too. How many are able to see it reality?
Many who are employed. With banks coming to help in making this dream a reality. Certainly this is the true cause of why land and real estate prices shooting past a middle class family's reach yet with the temptation of getting easy loans from banks for highly priced flats or plot of land it is possible now to realize it anyway.
Like they say, one thing leads to another, so too are bank loans responsible for our youth not kicking up jobs unless it is for a better and more lucrative job offer. We are bound to the bank in such a way that we keep paying up the monthly installment whether there's money for our basic necessities except for that costly roof over our heads under which it keeps worrying about the next monthly payment :D
Now for the planning part of our sweet home sweet. Do we have any choice really? It is the builder who gives out the plan and we just take it or move on to yet another builder. The business of satisfying a human mind about living spaces is very complex one indeed!! At the bargain prices that we want to fit everything fit for a king.
Before I forget, plans which comply with principles of Vaastu. In case the planning is over and correction as per Vaastu becomes a costly affair then Feng-Shui steps in to ward off effects of such bad planning. Are all these things a thing of the mind? Our minds question the very basis of such concepts passed down from ancient times by our wise ancestors. As I think more on Vaastu I find it is more a way to live in harmony with nature than the scare of not complying with it or worse still following it blindly and being superstitious about it.
Well more on this later when time permits!
Cheers.
Mahalakshmi
The wish to plan a home of our dreams. It goes through our minds all the time. when we have enough time we plan it on paper too. How many are able to see it reality?
Many who are employed. With banks coming to help in making this dream a reality. Certainly this is the true cause of why land and real estate prices shooting past a middle class family's reach yet with the temptation of getting easy loans from banks for highly priced flats or plot of land it is possible now to realize it anyway.
Like they say, one thing leads to another, so too are bank loans responsible for our youth not kicking up jobs unless it is for a better and more lucrative job offer. We are bound to the bank in such a way that we keep paying up the monthly installment whether there's money for our basic necessities except for that costly roof over our heads under which it keeps worrying about the next monthly payment :D
Now for the planning part of our sweet home sweet. Do we have any choice really? It is the builder who gives out the plan and we just take it or move on to yet another builder. The business of satisfying a human mind about living spaces is very complex one indeed!! At the bargain prices that we want to fit everything fit for a king.
Before I forget, plans which comply with principles of Vaastu. In case the planning is over and correction as per Vaastu becomes a costly affair then Feng-Shui steps in to ward off effects of such bad planning. Are all these things a thing of the mind? Our minds question the very basis of such concepts passed down from ancient times by our wise ancestors. As I think more on Vaastu I find it is more a way to live in harmony with nature than the scare of not complying with it or worse still following it blindly and being superstitious about it.
Well more on this later when time permits!
Cheers.
Mahalakshmi
Sunday, April 11, 2010
God's own country
Dear Friends,
Travelled to Trivandrum to attend a marriage.
Went by Jet Airways noon flight. Asked for a window seat to enjoy the sights on the way.
Until we flew along the eastern coast of Tamil Nadu, it was mostly dry with a few green fields here and there and waterways were not many.
After half hour into the flight, suddenly there appeared mountains and peaks of white snowy clouds. Some were gray and heavy with rain ready to pour the bounty on earth anytime. Down below, one could hardly see buildings which were far apart. I guessed we had crossed into Kerala.
As we neared our destination, there was a blanket of coconut trees and the banana plantations with tiled houses or buildings under them. The multi storeyed ones stood out like sore thumbs. Looked like humans were taking the hint from those tall trees to grow vertically indicating land was becoming scarce here too, where manufacturing industries are far and few in between. Kerala's economy thrives on tourism, Ayurveda, other service industries like hospitality, medical tourism, etc.
On my return journey I took the Chennai Mail which took us through the length of Kerala. We passed through Kochu Veli, Veli, Chenganaserri, Kottayam, etc. It was noon and through the hot sun those gray clouds would shed some rain here and there making the air cool as we went by.
At Kottayam, which happens to be my mother-in-law's birth place, felt a sting in my eyes as tears filled in. It was her most loved place. She would regale me with stories about life in this place though I had never set foot there till now. Maybe one day I shall land at Kottayam where her ancestral lands are tilled by her brothers' families till date. Her eyes bright and happy as she would recount those boat rides on the backwaters flowing beyond their backyards! How her father would ferry the produce of coconuts, rice husk and other agriculture produce in boats from their lands far away. I asked her soul to bless all our families from wherever she was right now.
I bought cashews, jackfruit chips, banana chips popularly known as the nendram varuval, some appalams and papadams which are made locally. The flavors are so very different from what we get in Tamil Nadu.
This trip would not be complete without a must visit to the famed Ananthapadmanabha Swamy temple. Its housed in a huge complex. Mahavishnu is reclining with Mahalakshmi by his side and other deities in attendance while he rests serenely with his right hand holding a lotus, almost touching ground where lord Shiva represented by a lingam is consecrated. Brahma, the creator rises from Mahavishnu's navel is present too. The holy Trinity are in attendance to hear out the devotees wishes. The reclining figure cannot be seen as a whole since its a huge carving. There are 3doors and the devotees have to pass in front of each door to view a section of the lord.
May Mahavishnu bless us all with good health, peace and all-round prosperity.
Mahalakshmi.
Travelled to Trivandrum to attend a marriage.
Went by Jet Airways noon flight. Asked for a window seat to enjoy the sights on the way.
Until we flew along the eastern coast of Tamil Nadu, it was mostly dry with a few green fields here and there and waterways were not many.
After half hour into the flight, suddenly there appeared mountains and peaks of white snowy clouds. Some were gray and heavy with rain ready to pour the bounty on earth anytime. Down below, one could hardly see buildings which were far apart. I guessed we had crossed into Kerala.
As we neared our destination, there was a blanket of coconut trees and the banana plantations with tiled houses or buildings under them. The multi storeyed ones stood out like sore thumbs. Looked like humans were taking the hint from those tall trees to grow vertically indicating land was becoming scarce here too, where manufacturing industries are far and few in between. Kerala's economy thrives on tourism, Ayurveda, other service industries like hospitality, medical tourism, etc.
On my return journey I took the Chennai Mail which took us through the length of Kerala. We passed through Kochu Veli, Veli, Chenganaserri, Kottayam, etc. It was noon and through the hot sun those gray clouds would shed some rain here and there making the air cool as we went by.
At Kottayam, which happens to be my mother-in-law's birth place, felt a sting in my eyes as tears filled in. It was her most loved place. She would regale me with stories about life in this place though I had never set foot there till now. Maybe one day I shall land at Kottayam where her ancestral lands are tilled by her brothers' families till date. Her eyes bright and happy as she would recount those boat rides on the backwaters flowing beyond their backyards! How her father would ferry the produce of coconuts, rice husk and other agriculture produce in boats from their lands far away. I asked her soul to bless all our families from wherever she was right now.
I bought cashews, jackfruit chips, banana chips popularly known as the nendram varuval, some appalams and papadams which are made locally. The flavors are so very different from what we get in Tamil Nadu.
This trip would not be complete without a must visit to the famed Ananthapadmanabha Swamy temple. Its housed in a huge complex. Mahavishnu is reclining with Mahalakshmi by his side and other deities in attendance while he rests serenely with his right hand holding a lotus, almost touching ground where lord Shiva represented by a lingam is consecrated. Brahma, the creator rises from Mahavishnu's navel is present too. The holy Trinity are in attendance to hear out the devotees wishes. The reclining figure cannot be seen as a whole since its a huge carving. There are 3doors and the devotees have to pass in front of each door to view a section of the lord.
May Mahavishnu bless us all with good health, peace and all-round prosperity.
Mahalakshmi.
Sunday, April 4, 2010
Attics - A place where lost things could be found!.
Dear Friends!
Finding things in a most unexpected way while rummaging through our attic takes us back in time about things and people associated with it.
We rarely find time to go through boxes, bags, etc containing these. At times we forget we have such a place at home where things are just put away for sorting out later which time never comes!
A few items are worth a mention while on this topic. Electronic gadgets which no longer work, vessels which were passed down from an earlier era having sentimental value, clothes which can never be used by anyone anytime except to provide fodder to moths and the like, books which no one has any time to glance leave alone read! Costume jewelery, which if kept for five more years could well be sold as antique pieces netting a fortune, maybe. :)
So it is a mission to even think of sorting these with the hope of organizing or discarding at least a few from the lot. Well if we do come to this stage and get down to serious work, we could get distracted as we stop by to remember the people who lovingly gifted us on special occasions, now collecting dust. Such items go back into their slots yet again for one reason or the other.
The best thing about this exercise could be to find the certificate or document which we thought was lost forever or some precious photographs which meant so much for those strong memories of happier times or a hand written letter by a dear one praising us for a good deed....
Should we continue to keep or just discard what we don't use anymore is a million dollar question evading an answer for centuries otherwise all these museums, antique and curio shops may never have existed, of course not to forget our very own private little museum or antique basement shop right at home. :D
Cheers!
Mahalakshmi
Finding things in a most unexpected way while rummaging through our attic takes us back in time about things and people associated with it.
We rarely find time to go through boxes, bags, etc containing these. At times we forget we have such a place at home where things are just put away for sorting out later which time never comes!
A few items are worth a mention while on this topic. Electronic gadgets which no longer work, vessels which were passed down from an earlier era having sentimental value, clothes which can never be used by anyone anytime except to provide fodder to moths and the like, books which no one has any time to glance leave alone read! Costume jewelery, which if kept for five more years could well be sold as antique pieces netting a fortune, maybe. :)
So it is a mission to even think of sorting these with the hope of organizing or discarding at least a few from the lot. Well if we do come to this stage and get down to serious work, we could get distracted as we stop by to remember the people who lovingly gifted us on special occasions, now collecting dust. Such items go back into their slots yet again for one reason or the other.
The best thing about this exercise could be to find the certificate or document which we thought was lost forever or some precious photographs which meant so much for those strong memories of happier times or a hand written letter by a dear one praising us for a good deed....
Should we continue to keep or just discard what we don't use anymore is a million dollar question evading an answer for centuries otherwise all these museums, antique and curio shops may never have existed, of course not to forget our very own private little museum or antique basement shop right at home. :D
Cheers!
Mahalakshmi
Saturday, April 3, 2010
Hope or Greed?
Dear Friends,
I often wonder about the expectations and hopes writ large on the faces of TV game shows' participants. Some are lucky to hit a medium jackpot but most are not that fortunate to win prize money.
Winning and not winning. There is a fine line dividing the two yet so many emotions pass through the mind in a split second of its occurrence. We feel extremely happy and lucky when we win and feel God has let us down badly if we lose! Our minds always want us to be happy and successful. We are never able to take failures or losses in our stride. We curse God, others and very rarely ourselves when we don't make it. The day we are able to see both success and failure with the detachment it deserves while continuing to do our karma we will continue to feel this way all our lives.
Like the wise say there's a fine line between a genius and a madman, so also there is a fine line between winning or losing in the game show called life.
Take life as an adventure.
Cheers!
Mahalakshmi
I often wonder about the expectations and hopes writ large on the faces of TV game shows' participants. Some are lucky to hit a medium jackpot but most are not that fortunate to win prize money.
Winning and not winning. There is a fine line dividing the two yet so many emotions pass through the mind in a split second of its occurrence. We feel extremely happy and lucky when we win and feel God has let us down badly if we lose! Our minds always want us to be happy and successful. We are never able to take failures or losses in our stride. We curse God, others and very rarely ourselves when we don't make it. The day we are able to see both success and failure with the detachment it deserves while continuing to do our karma we will continue to feel this way all our lives.
Like the wise say there's a fine line between a genius and a madman, so also there is a fine line between winning or losing in the game show called life.
Take life as an adventure.
Cheers!
Mahalakshmi
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