The Vulture Is A Very Patient Bird, Indeed!!

Office politics is not a dirty word at all.

It is part and parcel of our work culture in all offices across the globe.

I have observed from very close quarters how the juniors try to impress their supervisors, managers and the top guys at workplace.

This is something universal whether with office or with politics!

I always wonder whether quality work, creativity and hard work did matter as much as the ability to manage people and situations. If a person could combine both then you have a winner in hand.

1.
Take for example the Ex-IT minister, Mr.Raja's rise to the top! According to his mentor he was like any other budding lawyer, struggling to pay even his telephone bills in the rented office, not so long ago. Yet he rose to an enviable position to grant licences for 2G, 3G and what have yous, for an entire nation like India!
His people skills played a more important role than his abilities. News is trickling in about his meteoric rise to the top. He is supposed to have taken personal care of the late Murasoli Maran, (2nd in command in the DMK, a political party in Tamil Nadu) being at the beck and call of his star patient without second thoughts. He rose in the party later due to his proximity to the top cadres of the DMK. What an irony of fate that he was chosen to replace Maran's son, Dayanidhi Maran as the IT Minister by the CM Karunanidhi, in due course of time!!
Of course what happened after he became a union minister is not the topic I wish to discuss here.

All I would like to stress is how people make themselves useful to the powerful, at times sacrificing their own comforts and ambitions for the time being. All this, until they hit big time. In each and every case its the patience alongwith perseverance which seems to pay off ultimately. Remember the vulture is a very patient bird, indeed.

I have two more case histories to mention below before I wind up for the day:

2.
Another case is that of how the Late Smt.Priyamvada Birla was charmed by the care, attention and help rendered by the Birla family's chartered accountant, the Late Shri.Lodha who also passed away recently, though as a very rich man indeed.
Lodha used to reserve his entire time and energy to this elderly, childless widow who was ailing for many years. Left to herself, all alone in a palace full of servants and with very rare visits from own family members who lived nearby, she was made very much a part and parcel of Lodha's family. The other family members never came to give her company or enquire after her welfare, but tried to fight this clever man who usurped what belonged to PB which ran into billions of rupees. She willed it to him and this was fiercely contested in the Kolkata High Court between the Birla family and Lodha on the death of PB. Wills, Probates, et al.

3.
I should mention Smt.Lakshmi Parvati, a divorcee, who married the famed, but strict widower who had a very clean image where women were concerned, Shri.N.T.Rama Rao, a popular, evergreen hero of Telugu films and founder of Telugu Desam, a powerful political Party in Andhra Pradesh.
Smt.LP came to do her thesis on NTR's films and life and went on to become his life partner and advisor during his ailing last few years.
NTR is believed to have even mentioned in one of his interviews to a magazine that she cared for him when his family members did not even visit him out of courtesy to see how he was getting along in his old age.

What these families cannot understand is how can their rich and famous family member give away their family wealth to a rank outsider who just takes care of them in their old age or ailment? The belief is that the family wealth should remain within the family even if members don't take care of the needs or attend to these elderly people from within. If care is given from within then where is the need for any outsider to come in? This simple philosphy is never followed.

What is right and who is right? No one can say anything on this. But we can see that its all about money, money and money.

What brings people together? Initially it all begins as sympathy, listening to the woes of the other person. Doing those little things for a person which others might take for granted. A bond is formed due to this whether such actions are genuine or not, the fact is that a human needs another human to interact with. Money involved is secondary to the person who has the money, but it becomes primary for the person who does little things for the moneyed person to get into the inner circle.

Am I being cynical about the whole thing? I have observed this for long enough and know the pattern instantly. At times I do wonder whether the moneyed fellow is ignorant of what's happening? No. (S)he may not be that ignorant but with time they get used to the attention, care, help and affection from any person and later get addicted to it. They throw all caution and all feelings for their own near and dear who don't seem to care anyway, who don't have time for them, otherwise why should these people turn to strangers for help, care, affection and attention?!

Life goes on.

Mahalakshmi.

To Marry or not to?

Dear Friends,

I am withholding names of concerned people in the event I am going to narrate today.

Sister of a man aged about 38 came for help last year around this time. she wanted her brother to forget the girl he loved who refused to come out of her house to marry him against her parents' wishes, perhaps.
It was two years since there was heavy silence from both sides.
Boy seemed to lose interest in his life and was quite frustrated.
After work he would come home and even if he were to request for some tea, his sisters at home would tell him to go find a wife who would make it for him as they wont be around for long making him tea all their lives!
Which was true yet he wont budge nor look at any proposals his family would get for him.

Then one day his sister invited me over to her son's birthday party and the boy got talking to me. We were talking for the first time though I knew his background and about his refusal to get married to anyone else.

As we got talking he felt he should come to me for some counseling and advice.
I fixed a convenient time and asked him to air out whatever he felt. As usual he dint want to let down the girl he loved and dint understand why the girl dint have the courage to take a bold step when he was prepared to take her in as his wife.
Caste plays an important role in India and that was the primary reason for the girl's parents refusing to listen to any reasoning by the girl to get married to him.

I talked to him less and listened more to what he had to say.
When it was my turn to talk i reasoned out to him.
I pointed out that he was perhaps wasting his time waiting for this girl to come when she dint have the guts to take a few steps towards his house. Incidentally they both are neighbors and loved each other for more than 3 years!
I told him he was not getting any younger and that he needed a companion in life and it was time to get settled with the few proposals that still came his way.
His ideal time according to his chart cast by me was before July, 2009 and I told him so. I also pointed out that her parents were against her marrying him when they talked to me last about the matter, though I could never meet the girl who was always at home and there was always someone around. So no question of ever talking to her. I knew that this boy was wasting his time waiting for her.

I convinced him that he has to get married and the time was quite short and if not it could very well take even longer to find a suitable bride for him.

This was April, 2009.
In June 1st week the sister came smiling to invite me for her brother's marriage and gave me a generous compliment of turning around her brother to listen to reason when the same turned on deaf ears for so long however much his family tried to talk to him about it.
The wedding was fixed for July 6th, 2009 and the girl was his colleague from the same office he worked in.
This girl was also from a different caste from his.
Anyways the marriage took place and the girl was also in her mid thirties.

God is great. I see the couple happily going about leading a happy life from time to time. I am happy for them.
Yet I feel sad whenever I see or meet this girl who is still not married.
Her parents are now quite free of the tension from this boy who is now married. Whether they are going to take any concrete steps to get her married is to be seen and not discussed or talked about.
I watch silently with prayers in my heart for this girl whose parents wont budge to give her that happiness of selecting her own mate!

Only God can save such girls.

Take care.
Mahalakshmi