There are instances where people come over to invite my mother personally saying she's the eldest living member in our family. That they need her blessings for this function or that event. Yet in her presence they cite an example of a person who is younger than her by 5 or 6 years to be too sick to attend the occasion and how one should be cautious about one's health and never travel at all! In short they make sure to get across the message that she should not take the personal invitation too seriously and actually attend the function! After hearing such sermons no sane person will take their invitations too seriously. At least I won't.
Why come all the way to invite personally only to say such things? Why waste an invitation card at all? And what about our time and theirs too?
I have a tough time convincing my mother that such invitations are just for namesake and not meant to be really taken seriously by her. She lives in the past and places a lot of affection on her relatives and their families.
Three weddings in three families of her late sister. Two grooms are the great grandsons and one bride is a great grand daughter.
My mom was sentimental about attending the wedding. She and my dad had married off 4of her elder sister's grandsons and granddaughters twenty five years back (the rituals part only) .... now it was their children's weddings she wanted to attend.
I booked two tickets for both of us yet I was so reluctant to go there as the vibes were not positive at all.
It was as if the families were worried that my mom would actually come down to attend those weddings. There were many reasons like she is too old to travel from Chennai to Hyderabad or to Bangalore. She must not fall down and break her hip bones or fracture her limbs during travel. In whose house will she stay...
I booked rooms at the Taj Mahal hotel on SP Road, Secunderabad as that was nearer to the marriage venue and staying was not an issue at all with hotels all over cities now.
I had no heart in attending. Mom was so enthusiastic about her travel, she had packed all her things a week before the journey! I could not break her heart either. So I prayed to God to rescue me from this agony of travelling for her sake only.
Chennai had a stint of heavy rains just for the 2 days before our journey. We were to travel on the 17th Nov, rest in the hotel room on the 18th and attend the wedding on the 19th and board the train, the same day.
It rained so badly on the 14th, 15th and 16th that I asked my mom whether she still wanted to go. She said cancel the tickets and I gladly obliged. I knew God was on my side and din't want me to go to a wedding in which people were not sincere about wanting our presence.
Similar was the case of the wedding at Bangalore, in January this year. The invitation was delivered personally but the body language, the instances quoted while inviting us, about how the elderly should not travel, etc., indicated that it was a formal and social obligation which was being enacted without meaning a word of it.
If you think these 2 invitations were instances of taking the 'cake' then I want to share taking the 'bakery' episode from the same family!
The father of the groom rang up the relatives to inform that his son was getting married on such and such date at Chennai. He wanted to 'inform' about the marriage and asked relatives not to attend the wedding! When the relatives questioned why at all he wanted to even inform when he din't mean to invite them, he said, he din't want the relatives to 'hear' of the marriage through some other outside source! I appreciated the bakery approach much better.
1. The Bangalore party's inviation clearly said 'no' to any gifts for their son. So we din't give anything.
2. There was no question of any gift for the party who just wanted us to be 'informed'.
3. We sent across a gift of cash for the Hyderabad party and in turn they sent across a saree for my mom and some wedding sweets. After we rang to thank them, they shared some wedding photos through the mail! The other two din't share even the wedding photos!!
I check for positive signals whenever we are invited for any occasion by others. I have been to a wedding where the family had just mentioned their sincere desire for us to be present at their son's wedding in Chennai, promisig to send us the invitation which never arrived. But we attended the wedding anyway!
So its not the case of just receiving the invitation card.
It is whether the invitation comes from their heart.
Mahalakshmi.
Mahalakshmi.
Showing posts with label Blessings. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Blessings. Show all posts
Thursday, December 23, 2010
Thursday, December 2, 2010
Good Karma
A month back, my husband and I were invited to the wedding of the only daughter of Mr.T.Nataraajan, at the Mayor Ramanathan Hall, Santhome Road, Chennai.
The invitees must have easily exceeded 2000.
The marriage hall is huge and roomy, therefore, accommodating guests in thousands should not have been a problem. Right from managing the car parking, ushering in guests at the entrance, to directing them to the lift, hall, etc., were very well co-ordinated by a core group.
The marriage was well-attended, very well organized and the host circulated and attended to all the guests personally. The chaos which is typical of huge weddings was absent, meaning every little detail must have been taken care of with meticulous planning much ahead of the event.
Yet this blog is not about any of the above!
It was about the wedding invitation itself.
The host personally came to invite each one of us. The words he spoke, while handing us the card, were very sincere and touching enough to indicate that our presence meant a lot to him.
The wedding invitation card strictly requested us not to bring along any gifts of money, bouquets, etc. instead we were invited to grace the occassion and bless the couple for a long and happy married life.
The purity of thought made me re-read this humble, multi-dimensional request until its import could be absorbed fully.
Marriage is basically wishing the couple, gifting, mingling with guests who don't often meet in person except for occasions like these, catching up with the latest in each other's lives and enjoying the wedding feast.
To get an opportunity to celebrate, invite everyone known, attending personally to guests, and serving food to thousands without any expectations is in itself an act of good karma.
Here's an example of doing all of that in a single stroke.
This adds up in one's personal balance sheet, on the credits side, under the heading 'Good Karmas'.
Mahalakshmi.
The invitees must have easily exceeded 2000.
The marriage hall is huge and roomy, therefore, accommodating guests in thousands should not have been a problem. Right from managing the car parking, ushering in guests at the entrance, to directing them to the lift, hall, etc., were very well co-ordinated by a core group.
The marriage was well-attended, very well organized and the host circulated and attended to all the guests personally. The chaos which is typical of huge weddings was absent, meaning every little detail must have been taken care of with meticulous planning much ahead of the event.
Yet this blog is not about any of the above!
It was about the wedding invitation itself.
The host personally came to invite each one of us. The words he spoke, while handing us the card, were very sincere and touching enough to indicate that our presence meant a lot to him.
The wedding invitation card strictly requested us not to bring along any gifts of money, bouquets, etc. instead we were invited to grace the occassion and bless the couple for a long and happy married life.
The purity of thought made me re-read this humble, multi-dimensional request until its import could be absorbed fully.
Marriage is basically wishing the couple, gifting, mingling with guests who don't often meet in person except for occasions like these, catching up with the latest in each other's lives and enjoying the wedding feast.
To get an opportunity to celebrate, invite everyone known, attending personally to guests, and serving food to thousands without any expectations is in itself an act of good karma.
Here's an example of doing all of that in a single stroke.
This adds up in one's personal balance sheet, on the credits side, under the heading 'Good Karmas'.
Mahalakshmi.
Monday, October 25, 2010
Kamatchi Amman At Kanchipuram
Yesterday had to travel on work to Kachipuram.
It was a blessing as that would give me a chance to visit the ancient Kamatchi Temple at Kanchipuram which I make it a point to visit, whenever I am there.
All work got over by 6.30 pm and my colleague and I were blessed to have such a peaceful and close darshan of the mother goddess.
She was so divine in her yellow saree and diamonds twinkling from the oil lit lamps.
We saw the Alakshhmi and Lakshmi in the sanctum sanctorum too.
On our way out we saw two young elephants with restless trunks searching for donors of fruits and money. Their mahout was sitting on the floor in between those giants. One could almost miss him! He was sitting there with a thin stick in hand. That was to nudge them to extend their trunks to receive the offering of money and also to bless the giver! All three stayed alert to people who were just on-lookers and those who were taking money out of their purses.
After finishing going around the temple once, we wanted to be blessed by these two. I gave Rs.10 each. They are trained to take it so well and give our head a hit with their trunk - to bless. Perhaps that should also knock some sense into our heads :D
I was carrying a white cloth bag with my personal things like spectacles, etc. in it. Needless to say I was holding it in my left hand while I offered each elephant the money with my right hand. As they blessed me they brought their trunks down and gently started carressing my cloth bag! I knew they were searching for some eatable. It was done so very gently I dint realise it at that moment. Both did the same and I knew for sure it was their way of searching my bag for a fruit or a coconut, perhaps!!
Since we had to get back to Chennai before it got too dark, I chanted the Lalitha Sahasranamam on my way back. Usually I would chant it in the temple premises itself be it for the Kanchi Kamatchi or for Madurai Meenakshi.
My mom keeps reminding me to visit the 3rd of the famous holy triangle.
The three most important circuits for mother goddess are the Kanchi Kamatchi, Madurai Meenakshi and Kasi Visalakshi. I have been to the former two often enough. I am waiting for Kasi Visalakshi's benign blessings whenever that happens to be for me to have her divine darshan.
May we all be blessed by HER divine grace and prosper.
Mahalakshmi
It was a blessing as that would give me a chance to visit the ancient Kamatchi Temple at Kanchipuram which I make it a point to visit, whenever I am there.
All work got over by 6.30 pm and my colleague and I were blessed to have such a peaceful and close darshan of the mother goddess.
She was so divine in her yellow saree and diamonds twinkling from the oil lit lamps.
We saw the Alakshhmi and Lakshmi in the sanctum sanctorum too.
On our way out we saw two young elephants with restless trunks searching for donors of fruits and money. Their mahout was sitting on the floor in between those giants. One could almost miss him! He was sitting there with a thin stick in hand. That was to nudge them to extend their trunks to receive the offering of money and also to bless the giver! All three stayed alert to people who were just on-lookers and those who were taking money out of their purses.
After finishing going around the temple once, we wanted to be blessed by these two. I gave Rs.10 each. They are trained to take it so well and give our head a hit with their trunk - to bless. Perhaps that should also knock some sense into our heads :D
I was carrying a white cloth bag with my personal things like spectacles, etc. in it. Needless to say I was holding it in my left hand while I offered each elephant the money with my right hand. As they blessed me they brought their trunks down and gently started carressing my cloth bag! I knew they were searching for some eatable. It was done so very gently I dint realise it at that moment. Both did the same and I knew for sure it was their way of searching my bag for a fruit or a coconut, perhaps!!
Since we had to get back to Chennai before it got too dark, I chanted the Lalitha Sahasranamam on my way back. Usually I would chant it in the temple premises itself be it for the Kanchi Kamatchi or for Madurai Meenakshi.
My mom keeps reminding me to visit the 3rd of the famous holy triangle.
The three most important circuits for mother goddess are the Kanchi Kamatchi, Madurai Meenakshi and Kasi Visalakshi. I have been to the former two often enough. I am waiting for Kasi Visalakshi's benign blessings whenever that happens to be for me to have her divine darshan.
May we all be blessed by HER divine grace and prosper.
Mahalakshmi
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